cleaning, moods, & music

Yesterday, I did a ton of cleaning. I was just pretty upset about stuff, so I scrubbed. When you’re scrubbing, you don’t have to really have a conversation even if there’s someone else in the room. Well, that’s my theory anyway. So, I did dishes. Not just the dishes that were in the sink, but also inspected dishes from the cupboard & did the ones that were not up to my standard. All the pots & pans are now really, really shiny. Then, I swept & mopped the kitchen floor. It’s clean. I know it was just mopped 3 days before, but not by me. If it wasn’t cleaned by me, then it’s just not really clean. That’s how I see it. Then, the dining room table, & each separate chair (there are 6 heavy oak chairs to match the heavy oak dining table).

I was just in a very pensive mood. And I tried to not think about what was bothering me all day. But of course I did think about it. ALL. DAY. When I tried to not to think of it, I would get a song in my head. Wanna hear what song ran through my head all day?

step out the front door like a ghost into a fog where no-one notices the contrast of white on white
and in-between the moon & you, angels get a better view of the crumblin difference b/t wrong & right
I walk in the air, b/t the rain, through myself & back again
where, I don’t know. Maria says she’s dyin, through the door I hear her cryin; why, I don’t know.

Yes, folks, I had just those lines, the 1st verse of ‘Round Here runnin through my head everytime I tried not to think about what I desperately was trying to get my mind off of. Not the whole song, just that 1st verse. Over & over (& over & over).

Here’s a lil background for ya. My freshman year of college, I bought my 1st cds. As in 1st cds ever. I had only owned tapes & vinyl before then. August & Everything After was one of my 1st cds EVER. & I had this next-door neighbor, who is now my BFF. And one time she came over & confiscated the cd from me, b/c I was so miserable, & kept listening to ‘Round Here on repeat. For like, 2 days straight. Prob longer than that, but I’ll put down a conservative estimate. That’s for all those out there who’re always saying that I’m exaggerating stuff.

Anyway, I must just enjoy wallowing in my misery. I cleaned & had that 1st verse over & over in my head. It’s just so tragically beautiful, it makes you wanna cry. I know ppl are always on Adam Duritz. They talk smack about him. “How does he get all these really attractive girls when he looks like the way he looks?” Well, ppl, like Jules said in Pulp Fiction, “personality goes a long way”. Why wouldn’t someone want to get to know someone who can write lyrics like that? So, maybe that’s why Adam got d’girls.

So, this morn, I woke up, & in the shower I realized my head had just switched soundtracks. I now had “Santeria” in my head, but when you get to that last line of the 1st verse, I sang “I’d pop a cap in heina” instead of sancho. Yeah, so that’s when I realized that I was over my misery. Only, I now had to get out of this new violent state of mind. I’m really not a violent person. Some ppl can do “really aggressive”, I just can’t pull it off. I think it’s b/c I’m too lazy to put in all the effort for the “follow-through” involved.

Anyway, the point of this whole long-winded story is that I’m in love w/ a new song. That doesn’t mean the song I was formerly in love w/ is no long a song I am still in love w/. I’m just in love w/ another song too. You can totally do that. I checked. So, the last song I was in love w/ was Outkast’s “The way you move”. I’m still in love w/ it. And that’s not to say there weren’t other really great albums that came out in between that & my current “in love” song. Like Gwen Stefizzle’s L.A.M.B., Kanye’s Late Registration, the Killers, & the Gorillaz (I love how they have orchestral instruments on every track). All of them had great songs, from the 1st track to the last. And they all had songs that I loved, & I listened to constantly. But, I heard this new song about a month ago that I knew I was gonna love. And I tried to fight it, but I have to admit, that I’m totally in love w/ it. It’s Crazy by Cee-lo & Danger Mouse. If y’all haven’t heard it yet, you have to. You might think you hate it, but that’s just denial.

So, I’ve now had it in my head all day now; & I’m totally happy w/ it. If you want, go pick up the album. It’s called “St. Elsewhere” by Gnarls Barkley.

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